The day has just begun and I can already tell that I am going to be in one of my thinking/ what ever you want to call it moods.
This past week I've been thinking about how I miss my dad and I haven't really said that before. He wasn't that bad of a person, it was just he had/has a disease that he can't control .... I have barely started typing and the thoughts keep pouring through my head .... each one contradicting another to the point that I can't seem to get it out ... maybe that is my problem .... I need to straighten things out in my head .... Anyways ... awhile ago I saw my dad at the mall and he asked how I was doing and found out that I was in College taking Journalism ... he seemed happy to hear that .... he asked if I had money on me and then gave me $40 ... it really helped bc I picked up some more stuff for school .... he gave me a hug and said he'd call within the next 2 days or so bc he still had Christmas gifts for us and thought maybe he could take me to Swiss Chalet .... I was excited because that would have been the perfect way to start things up ... but instead ... he never called ... and I haven't heard from him since .... That was a let down .... but I guess I should have made it more clear that I was ready to start talking to him and stuff .... I mean he may have given up cause it has been 4yrs since we have really spent a long amount of time together .... *shakes head* .... I don't know what to think .... He's my father, I know he loves me and I love him .... yea ....
Well I'm going to go cause mom wants to use the computer and then we are going out to do goodness knows what ....