Well ... here's my dilema.

I have been asked to go to a party tonight. Aniko, from work, is holding a party because of school ending and what not ... Now here's my thing ... and I know it sounds stupid and some of you will want to smack me... but ...
I've been asked to parties, but I never show up because I get so nervous. I will only know like three people and that worries me ... yes everyone ... I know ... I'm very self concious and I have low self esteem ... and I want to push myself to go ... but geez .. this is so friggin hard .. I'm trying to get ahold of Kelly or Holly and maybe they can push me to go ... fuck ... i hate being this way ... and Holly might be there!!!! *giggles* ... damn my nerves ... damn me