Well the past few days have been interesting, and I've experienced a rainbow of emotions. So many things have gone wrong and many things have gone right. I'm really confused on SOME of the situations Im in *shrugs*

A) My sister is going through a lot right now. She is growing up and her body can't handle it. Her spine is shifting and her hips are growing, causing her EXTREME pain. There isn't much that we can do for her right now, just try and make her comfortable. Nov. 2 she has an appointment so see the specialist about spinal surgery. Im scared .... She also has an appointment tomorrow for another type of surgery.

B) My cousin Robert's wheelchair fell apart the other day and he is hurt pretty badly. His stump is bruised and he has to stay in bed for a couple weeks because there isn't any other way for him to get around.

C) Saturday was a hellish day UNTIL I went out with Linz, Greg, Nimisha and Alicia. We all went to My Cottage and had a blast! I danced all damn night and had fun doing it. INFACT, I was the 4th person on the dance floor *bows* Also all night, RIGHT beside us was a group of girls dancing together and ONE of them was ABSOLUTELY beautiful. I hope one day I run into her again because I enjoyed smiling and making eye contact all night (LMAO).

D) PARTY ON MONDAY ... plus I'll probably be at My Cottage on Saturday Night again

E) Miscommunication has left me $160 in the hole. Now, shit happens, but I don't like how the other party is handling themself. I don't like being blamed for everything when it isn't 100% my fault. Sure I got ticked off on the phone, but come on ... I just found out I lost out on $120 ... I think everyone would have got pissed off, worst of all I couldn't discuss it because I was at a friends house.

F) I'm picking up quite a few hours at work and I love it!!! I especially enjoy that there are so many new people and I get along with most of them like Hirra, Shebana, Sunita AND ANIKO IS BACK .... lol

Pissed off and frusterated

Not much is new with me. It's 6am so this isnt going to be a very thoughtful entry because Im half asleep.
Today I went to NOTL with my aunt and walked around, we also stopped past the canal and sat out to eat our lunch. We were at an area that is really far up and there is no fence. I was sitting in a cement stairwell that lead right into the canal. It was cool, because when a boat came the water would rise and fall by quite a bit.
ANYWAYS, after that I came home and ate then Bedrana picked me up and I went over to her place. She has a new puppy named Max and he is so friggin cute! He has one blue eye and one brown eye, loves chewing on things and getting into mischief. Oh, we also went for a walk down in Port Dalhousie. She is such an interesting person, we basically just spent over 5 hours talking about random things, walking, playing cards and looking through her pictures. It was realy cool to see photos from Switzerland, Bosnia/Serbia and then pictures of her father in Kuwait. *shrugs* She just really opened my eyes last night to the way that other countries percieve Canada and the way that other people live.
Today I work at 3:30 ... it's the shift that I hate ... FRIDAY NIGHT. I hate how pissy people get and I hate how the jamaicans harass all of the women. It's so damn annoying! ummmm ... April is in for a bit tonight ... I have to ask her about her boat ... I know she has one and thats about it. My aunt and I are going to steal it

Here it comes another rant about life, if you dont want to hear it, then stop reading. I really dont feel like answering to anyones fucking replies about how I am too hard on everyone including my damn self. You know what, we are all too hard on everything.
The basics are, we are all just a bunch of jerks living together. Nomatter how much we try to disguise it, we all have faults.
Currently I am pissed off at myself. I am upset about the life a lead. Currently my mum and I hardly speak, most of that is attributed to the asshole that has taken over my house. I want him out. I can't stand him anymore. He is a rude and arrogant person, more so than most.
Now, that I do not have my mother to take me on drives nor do I EVER have an empty house, I spend numerous hours with Dar. Being with Dar is tiring. She is depressed and crazy. She cant move from the past ... she doesnt realize not everyone is after her. That seems to be a trend in my family. Always afraid of somebody ruining out happiness. ALSO, Dar is obsessed with Wayne and the lottery. Im ready to fucking pop my ear drums.
Yesterday we drove past my autn nancy's and that was the first time I had seen her since she was diagnosed with MS. She has been working with a speech therapist, so she is doing better with that. Still though, looking at her I felt sad ...
Then my sister. My sister is in a lot of pain and I cant stand seeing that. Every so often you turn her the wrong way and she'll just whail. I hug her and sometimes she settles, but you can see in her eyes that she is in pain.

Well Im getting ready to go on a staff ghost tour of Fort George, I am so friggin excited. I'm sad that Lisa can't make it, especially since we've been talking more. *shrugs* I told her we'll have to go out this weekend ... mua ha ha ha ...

So I have come to the conclusion that I am going to move out and I am looking for people that are SERIOUSLY interested. It won't be for a couple more months, so I can save up money for first and last payment and other things I'll need. I am looking to spend $400 or under, and I would be fine with a 2 or 3 bedroom places, so if you have another person looking for roomates, just tell me. Anyways, Im going to start looking through ads and stuff finding out costs and all that

I realized today that I cannot live at home and go to school ... actually ... I realized that I can no longer live at my house. I need to find a roomate ... Seriously if anybody out there wants to get a place with me I would love you forever. I would be fine with splitting bills ... I'm a clean person ... I can't really cook ... I love cleaning ... You'd need to teach me how to do laundry and dishes aren't too much of a problem ... I hardly sleep ... I write a lot ... I work at Wal-Mart and my family would help us out if we really needed it .... basically I would be fine living in a shack, just as long as I had an area that was somewhat private ... ummm ... email me or call me

Here is a sneak peek of something that I have been writing. I've finally decided it is time I put my strange stories and ideas down on paper and take the time to weave them all together for everyone to read. I am working on the story of the Pond People. Basically a society that we cannot see but we reek the benefits of their existance. Here is a SNEAK PEEK

Little Lavie climbed up to the very top of a rock, which was sitting at the side of the pond, and jumped as far as she possibly could. She landed right inside the fold of the maple leaf, but had trouble keeping her balance because the leaf was slippery from the rain that fell earlier in the day.
Lavie thought this might be her chance, she might finally be able to make it to the lake, without anyone catching notice of her leaving and dragging her back to the pond.
Lavie curled into a ball and held on tightly to the rim of the leaf, wishing a gust of wind would quickly come and lift her up high into the air, before anyone had the chance to notice she was missing from her Plant Life class.
Five minutes passed, then twenty minutes and soon it had been an entire half an hour. Little Lavie was beginning to think the wind was never going to blow, but just as the thought was crossing her mind, a HUGE gust of wind came and sent the maple leaf and Lavie spinning in the air.
“Finally I am going to see the lake!” cried Little Lavie.

Google your name in quotes with "is".. ie: " (your name) is" , and then post the top 10 responses..

1. Gillian is horrified when all she finds are biscuits and ready-meals (BISCUITS ... WTF)

2. Gillian is determined to get the McGlynns out of their junk food rut (I see a pattern)

3.Gillian is a trained dancer (lmao, yea ... so you better watch out)

4. Gillian has a touch of the guru about, her and for what it is, it's good (Im a sex guru)

5. triathlon pin Gillian is injured (yea, I ran 3 steps and passed out from exhaustion)

6. Gillian is kneeling on the left (no comment)

7. Gillian is passionate about teaching, especially adults (not really)

8. Gillian is now 48 and she states that she has been depressed since she was 13 (is this trying to fucking tell me something)

9. Gillian is available for 'Group' coaching (I AM a sex guru ... lmao )

10. Gillian is prettier in my opinion, but Hebe looks nice too (Poor hebe)

So apparently I am going to lose weight, become a famous sex guru ... but be depressed for the rest of my life

I never knew how public my life was, and that bugs me. As you all know, I have nurses come through my house constantly, and I of course talk to them and what not. They see me go through a range of emotions, and despite how hard I try, I can't always hide them. Today I found out that 3 nurses filed a complaint about Jeff walking through the house without a shirt. I admit that is a little awkward, but you get over it, he's just a guy and it's been really hot. Apparently all the nurses have been talking about Jeff living in the house and the effects on me and my sister, they've been talking about our financial situation and some other things. I didn't realize the company interviewed all the nurses whenever a complaint was filed. All of the nurses know everything about me ... especially since a complaint was filed that I stalked a nurse. NO I DIDNT. It was a long time ago, but I thought we were friends ... I thought we could discuss things ... I mean she always tried to get me to go out with her and Jen .... she always told me to come out in the living room ... and help lift Jen ... like ... sure she was pretty ... but she was an odd ball. Im still ticked off about that one, if you can't tell. I just, I hate having everything so public. Everyone knows ... people know some of the gritty details too ... UGH!!! I can't relay what's in my mind ... but basically I live in a story or a movie ... where people are constantly watching my every move waiting for what comes next ... and it's hard ...