My New Years was rather interesting. The single most depressing New Years of my life but it amuses me to look back on it.
I spent the day with Lidia. I picked up $40 in Joe Feta's food because despite she was sick her appetite was still there and she insisted on food. So I grabbed some movies and headed over. We watched Sister Act and near the end she took a turn. She became very ill, so I stayed with her and well ... looked after her. I called home and none of my friends had called to say anything about New Years plans so I stayed the night with Lidia.
She was so ill and I felt horrible for her ... I was sad that I couldn't make her feel better. I just sat there and kept changing the movies and every so often I'd talk to her about something random.
Then Rob called and she left me for a good 45 minutes in the living room while she went and spoke to him. The tv was on mute so I'd catch the occasional thing she was saying. Her tone of voice was so different and it hurt. I wanted to grab my coat and run out the door. I didn't though ... I just sat there. She came back into the room and I just sat there.
Then we spoke a bit cause she had perked up ... then we grabbed the bucket and I sat beside her and held her hair and rubbed her back as she gagged.
We ordered pizza much later on and sat on the floor, toasting the pathetic New Years Eve we were having.
SHe passed out at 11:20 so I watched tv ... including the Niagara Falls special. 3 minutes to 12 I woke her up and told her to sit up with me. I basically picked her up with her blanket and propped her up beside me and held on to her. I put my chin on her head and said ... 1 minute ... and then suddenly 10 9 8 7 ... 2 ... 1 HAPPY NEW YEAR ... then she got up and went to go to bed and Rob called again so she spoke to him briefly then joined me in the living room again ... then she hugged me and went to bed ....
We woke up this morning and I was exceedingly depressed. She tried to talk with me but I felt like crap .... Then I kinda woke up and we spoke a bit and my aunt came to pick me up. She gave me a kiss and hug ... and that was my New Years Eve

My resolution is that this year I will do more for myself, including pushing myself beyond my boundaries. I have realized that I can no longer sit and sulk. I HAVE to help myself.